Why Teach Honesty and Realism?
Honesty is more than just “telling the truth.” It’s a way of living with clarity, rooted in respect—for oneself, for others, and for reality itself. Realism, likewise, is not pessimism but a practical understanding of the world as it is, not as we wish it to be.
Together, honesty and realism form a person’s ability to:
- Make wise decisions, based on facts, not fantasies;
- Build trust with others;
- Take responsibility for one’s actions;
- And grow into adulthood with emotional and moral maturity.
The Harm of Excessive Care and Magical Thinking
Excessive care—overprotecting children or avoiding uncomfortable truths—can unintentionally cripple their ability to face life. Children who are never allowed to fail, feel pain, or confront real-world limits often grow up:
- Emotionally fragile,
- Ill-equipped for conflict or independence,
- Dependent on external validation or rescue.
Similarly, a childhood saturated with false promises, “you can be anything” slogans, or tales of magical salvation, without grounding in real-world context, can distort expectations. This isn’t a critique of fantasy or fiction, but rather of magical thinking replacing critical thinking.
The Problem with Magic and Fairy Tales in Education
Fairy tales and magic-centric stories, when not clearly framed as symbolic, can foster:
- Passive hope over active responsibility,
- A belief in rescue by fate or “miracles,”
- Unrealistic expectations of life, relationships, and success.
Unlike meaningful fantasy or allegory (which can inspire creativity and moral reflection), poorly framed tales of magic often present:
- Good and evil as simplistic, instead of morally complex;
- Rewards without effort, leading to entitlement;
- Success as destiny, not a product of work and growth.
These distortions blur the lines between imagination and deception, especially when reinforced by media and consumer culture.
Infantilism and Fear of Responsibility
Many adults today live in a state of extended adolescence—a phenomenon known as adult infantilism. It is marked by:
- Avoidance of responsibility,
- An obsession with comfort and entertainment,
- Reliance on external “parental” structures (government, corporations, ideologies).
This state often originates in a childhood that discouraged autonomy and punished honesty, replacing real understanding with comfort, and truth with pleasing illusions.
The adult who was never encouraged to confront reality grows afraid of it. They may cling to idealized heroes, saviors, or systems—avoiding the painful but necessary step of becoming their own responsible agent.
Consequences of Honesty: Strengths and Challenges
Advantages of Honesty:
- Builds deep trust and meaningful relationships,
- Encourages self-growth through accountability,
- Promotes mental clarity and peace of mind,
- Helps in developing social responsibility.
Disadvantages or Challenges:
- May bring conflict or rejection in a dishonest culture,
- Can reveal painful truths and require change,
- Often demands courage and resilience others avoid.
But even the disadvantages are temporary, compared to the lasting damage of deception—self-deception most of all.
Roots of Dishonesty and Social Irresponsibility
Many of society’s flaws that discourage honesty stem from:
- Low education levels, especially critical thinking,
- A media environment built on manipulation, not truth,
- Corporate cultures that exploit weakness for profit,
- Consumer industries that encourage instant gratification over long-term responsibility.
Manufacturers of products, lifestyles, and entertainment often rely on people staying uninformed or distracted. Hope is sold like candy. Suffering is hidden. Success is marketed, not earned.
Most people, overwhelmed by these pressures, adopt comfortable illusions instead of seeking empowering truths—thus perpetuating the very problems they dislike.
Building a Culture of Honest Realism
To build a better world, we must teach children—and remind adults—that:
- Life is complex, but not cruel;
- Responsibility is hard, but freeing;
- Truth can hurt, but it heals;
- Realism is not the enemy of hope—it is its foundation.
Imagination has its place, but it must walk hand in hand with honesty and critical reflection. And caring for others must empower them—not protect them from the truth.
A society that values honesty and realism raises people who are truly free.
Author: Vlad Shapran
My life is a story about continuous education, which makes a person's life meaningful and useful.
